If you want your child to be creative, if you want them to find their "voice", don't expect them to be a "good girl."
I was such a child. Even my adolescence passed with relative ease for my parents. I was not a rebel. I liked being in places where I felt welcome and appreciated, and it actually freed me from the need to prove or rebel. Even when I created (and I always created something...) I did it carefully. Usually with an attempt to be "like...". "Finding my own voice" was not a concept I was exposed to at all.
For me It arrived late. Call me slow, call me late bloomer. For me it came towards the age of 50. That's when I started painting. Freestyle painting.
I remembered this now because a few days ago someone came to my studio for a Paint-Play workshop and when we got to the playing stage she said that it was difficult for her to "just paint". She needs directions. Let her be told what to do. Give her assignments.
Since I could identify with her it was easy for me to give her the right answer. But before we get to that, I want to take a moment to describe the situation.
People who come into my studio testify that the feeling is a pleasant one. That they feel good energies. Everything is "dirty": the walls, the floor, the table... but it's not repulsive dirt. It is an allowing one, and it kind of say you don't have to be careful here. Truth is, it's not really dirt. It's paint that was smeared and splashed and dripped on the table, on the wall and on the floor. Other than that, all is neat. Everything has a place. Soft light penetrates from all sides, from the high windows that surround the entire studio and are covered in frosted glass. It all invites for a free and almost limitless creation. A winning format for those who are not used to rebellion as a way of life. There is a frame, but within it - an invitation to full release.
Back to that lady who came for a Paint Play workshop:
I smiled at her in understanding and told her that I had a feeling that this time it would be different. This time I tell her that she "should" rebel. that she "needs" to let go. that she "should" paint like a child. This is her mission. This is the direction.
She enjoyed It so much.